5th August 2009 at 3:08 pm #463
When I arrived at Aidan’s door step to begin my first session I was obsessed with food and weight. I constantly thought about how much i had eaten that day, what i would eat for my next meal, I’d tally up how many calories I’d already had several times a day…many of my days would end in a binge. I woke up most mornings promising my self i would only eat fruit for 3 days (banana’s not included!) some times i would manage a couple of days… but inevitably i would spiral out of control and binge. My relationship was a constant pain, my perception was warped and my self image in tatters. This is how i began my journey.
Very soon I realised that food and weight were merely a distraction that i used to keep myself from realising just how unhappy i was, and how powerless i felt- I needed to believe that when i was skinny i would be happy and all the other problems would fall into place-
I learnt many thing’s over the weeks about the distorted beliefs i had developed as a child and lived with and accepted into adulthood- of course in my rational mind i knew these to be inappropriate – but the beauty of the therapy is being able to communicate to the subconscious mind- this is where the real changes needed to happen and happened!- and because the change is subconscious it creeps up on you- you don’t have to make a conscious decision to try and change the way you feel or behave, nor do you have to wrestle with the old pain or emotions that overcame you before- THEY’RE JUST GONE!!
10 weeks later (I was a slow starter!) i left Aidan’s office a changed person. I eat normally! If i over indulge now and then on a meal out- it’s not the end of the world!
My relationship is actually starting to be fun and honest and close! I can’t stop smiling! I feel like someone has lifted a veil that has been blocking my view for years -i can see clearly now, I can identify situations, people and circumstances for what they are. I feel balanced and strong and filled with a genuine enthusiasm for life and being alive that i never had before!
If you’re considering therapy DO THIS!! you’ve nothing to lose and more then you’ve ever hoped to gain!!
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